Wednesday, April 28, 2010

What I Learned from My Mom/Mother's Day Giveaway!


I have two special women that I call "Mom". I want to write a little bit about them and what I have learned from them.

The first person is my mother who lives in Japan. My mother married young and had me when she was 20 years old. Some of you know that because I was born with few rare conditions, I had to get my leg amputated when I was two. All my life, the hospital and I were inseparable, and we still are.

I just wanted you all to know that I don't want you to think that I write these things so people pity me or that I want to get more attention. It is just such a big part of my life that it is impossible not to write about it while telling you about me.

Anyways, going back to my mother... consider being so young, and having a child with a sickness that will last rest of her life. Now I am a mom of three, I can't imagine the worry and heartaces she felt while she was raising me. But, she never treated me any different then my sister.

There are so many things I learned from my mom, but two things come to my mind, the first one is "courage". I will tell you one incident that has stuck with me for a long time...

The prosthetic limb I had when I was little was a very simple primitive looking one. It was a pirate leg (peg-leg). The neighbor kids would always tease me and said very mean things. Sometimes they even got physical... I think I was 3, or 4 years old at the time; the kids were so mean I went home crying... guess what my mother did.

She gave me a broom and said, "I can't protect you all the time, you have to learn to stand up for yourself. Tell them that you don't like what they do and say. "Until you do something about it, I won't let you back in the house.", with that, she closed the door, and I heard it lock.

I cried and screamed for a while hoping that she would change her mind and open the door. I am pretty sure that I thought she was a devil. There were no signs of her coming to open the door, so I stood up and went to find those kids.

All I remember was I spotted them from far away, I mean real FAR AWAY, I screamed something and threw the broom at them. (it probably fell on the ground). Then I ran back home, my mom immediatly opened the door and hugged me tight and said with tears in her eyes, "Good job, good job."

I don't know if I can do the same thing to my kids, I would probably be smacking those other kids around with the broom myself.

I am not saying that, this method would work for all the children, but it definately helped me in my life. To have the knowledge that I can speak up and be courageous gave me the confidance that I needed. Later she told me that She didn't want me to grow up ashamed of myself and how I look. I am so grateful she gave me that gift.

Another thing I learned from her was "Compassion". I was probabley around 7 or 8 years old. My mother was packing our car with big bag of rice, potatoes, and other food items from our pantry and refrigerater, they were nearly empty. After that was done, she told me and my sister to get in the car and she started driving. I asked her, "where you taking these?" and she said, "to my friend."

My mom had this friend, she was divorced with three small children. Her ex-husband wasn't paying any kind of child support or alimony. Even though she was working two jobs, it was very difficult for her to support herself and her children. Sometimes, they went without electricity or phone connection and food. (My mother told me these details when I was much older).

Not knowing all these things, I was very confused and worried. My parents always had medical bills they had to pay, even though I was young, I knew, we weren't doing so well either. I asked my mom "Why are you giving those things away? What about us?"

She was quiet for a while, then said, "She is my dear friend, and she and her children are in trouble. I can't just let them starve. We are in a slightly better position then they are, so I want to help. Don't worry, we will be fine, we will get by."

I didn't ask any more questions. We were all quiet the rest of the ride there. My mom was right, we were fine, we didn't go without. I don't even remember what we ate till the next pay day, but I know we were always fed.

What I remember is the face of the youngest boy, and the words my mother said, that night. "I can't afford not to help".

What's great about her is, she doesn't even mention any of these things to anybody. She would quietly help and forget. I am so blessed to have her as my mother, and she taught me life's important things through her actions.

Another special person is my mother-in-law. I call her "mom". As I was born and raised in Japan by strict parents, It was just very awkward for me to call her by her first name. I felt like I was disrespecting her. After thinking it over sometime, I decided to call her mom.

That's exactly what she was. One thing I learned from her was "acceptance". She helped me to get used to living in America, and accepted me as her daughter-in-law.

I don't know how she felt, when her son told them that he wants to marry someone rather average looking who is from a different country, who doesn't speak their language well AND, who has many medical problems. She was always nice and kind towards me. She was the one who took me around to find my wedding dress, taught me some American cooking and we watched many chick flicks together.

I hope I can be as nice and as graceful as she is, when my children bring someone to introduce to us as their future spouce.

Another thing I learned from her is "Love for her family". She is a devoted mother, who has raised five children. Her love for God and her family is always inspiring to me. She is also a wonderful grandmother to our children. Last summer, she took my children and their cousins to museums, movies, and many fishing trips. They loved it! It is great to see that they are building a special relationship. I am so grateful that she is taking the time to do that.

More importantly, I am grateful she raised such a wonderful man like my husband who is fun, loving and loyal. I know he is who he is, because of her. I am eternally grateful for that.

I am nowhere near being the perfect mom, but it is my deepest desire that my children will learn something from me that will enrich their lives. I think it is so important to teach and take care of our children spiritually, as well as physically. I take that very seriously as a mom.

I know there are MANY, MANY wonderful mothers out there, I just wanted to do some "Tea Rose Home" style celebration of Mother's day! That's where the giveaway comes in!

I am giving away up to $20 worth of items to two people from my etsy shop!

This will run from now til the end of day, May 5th.

Now ladies, it is your turn. Here are the rules and how to enter to the giveaway:

1. Let me know what you have learned from your mom. (you will get one entry)

2. Become a follower of my blog and show me your beautiful face on my side bar (second entry)

3. Blog about this post and giveaway on your blog and link back (third entry)

I will be looking forward to reading what you have learned from your moms.
Moms, mothers, and mommies...You all are wonderful! Everyone Happy Mother's Day!

106 comments :

  1. my mom was everything your mom wasnt-you are very blessed!
    but thankfully i had a nana that loved me. she always told me how beautiful i was (i had some weight problems as a child and was in no way even cute), she was proud of all that i did and loved me no matter what.
    what i learned from her was to make my boys know that i love them. to tell them seperately and around each other why they are special to me. because of nana, i am the mom i am today.

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  2. What a beautiful tribute to both of your moms! You are truly blessed! My mom taught me the importance of telling my son 'why' I expect something from him or 'why' I won't let him do something. By giving him understanding I allow him to see the reasoning behind my words and empower him to make the right choices because of it. I takes a lot of rebellion out of the picture because he sees that my words and actions are motivated because of my love for him.

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  3. I also follow your blog. :0)

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  4. I was blessed in that I had two mothers. My mother passed away from cancer when I was 5 years old but her grace in dealing with her illness has always stayed with me. I knew I was loved.
    My second mother was my mother's friend. She was a single mom to 5 children and virtually no income yet she took me in. As she passed away a mere 4 weeks ago I cannot write about all that she did for me without becoming a sobbing mess. But if you read my blog post today you can see some of the lasting gifts these women have inspired in me.

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  5. My mother is amazing. What did she teach me? Every thing that I now know that has made me a mother, wife, friend, daughter, teacher, crafter...

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  6. I made a layout about my mom that you can view http://stufftoscrap.com/photopost/showphoto.php?photo=10076&title=my-mom&cat=all

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  7. My mom and I grew up together. She was married at 15 and had me at 16. She taught me how to jump rope, skate, ride a bike, and make mud pies. She loves her children, her sons-in-law and her grandchildren like none other. But she loves the Lord with all her heart and is an example to us all. She's a giver and will always give you her last dime. In June she will be a great-grandmother. I can't wait for my grandchildren to get to know her.

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  8. I'm now a follower. (I thought I already was!)

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  9. What a lovely and amazing tribute to both your mom and your mother in law!

    My mom always taught me to speak my mind and to always be myself, even if it wasn't the popular thing to do. I'm greatful because as an adult I have a real sense of self worth and thats because my mom always made my individuality something to be cherished, which is a bretty groundbreaking thing when I was growing up :)

    Amanda
    ohmandie7@yahoo.com

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  10. I have learned the power and importance of prayer. She is always first to remind me where to look for peace and guidance!

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  11. Sashiko! What a heartfelt, tear-jerking post! :)

    My mum always taught me the value of hard, honest work but also humility and strength of character. She has worked incredibly hard all her life to provide for us, and has made sure we never went without, even though we had no luxuries growing up.

    I owe everything I am to her. Her determination, courage and strength are inspiring.

    and I already follow your wonderful blog!

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  12. My mom taught me how to be independent and work for the things I have. I learned nothing is given to you and I appreciate what I have because I worked hard to get it! I learned how to be a mother, how to love my children and play with them! My mother has a great sense of humor (she talks like the animals in cars, cracks us up) So now I talk like I am the animals to my children!
    amberl@mtaonline.net

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  13. I loved your story about your two moms.. funny and sad at the same time! I loved the broom story! I tell my son if someone tackles him at school to do it back to them! He decided he would trip them instead.. All fine and dandy if he doesn't get caught by a yard duty! But like your mom I want him to stand up for himself!

    I follow your blog!
    amberl@mtaonline.net

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  14. I love everything about this post!

    My mom set me free. When I was 20 and in college, I was having a hard time after a difficult breakup and a heavy course load. Crying to her about it on the phone one night, she told me, "Take the rest of your college fund, go to Europe. Travel. Do whatever you want. Start your life!" While I didn't actually leave school, she gave me permission to take control of my own destiny and realize the only one that had to live my life was.. me! I was able to get a new perspective and have embraced that perspective ever since. No station in life is permanent, any situation can (and will!) change. Just take the first step, make a different decision.

    (And although I stayed in school, I did transfer 2000 miles away for my last year, had a BLAST, and met my now husband of 12 years. I wouldn't have done any of that if not for that conversation)

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  15. Such a moving story. It was wonderful to read all your thoughts that really came from within and all the love with which you spoke about these two women! I am sure you are a great mother too, and striving to be better makes you the best!
    smiles and hugs, Erika (from Romania)

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  16. My mom is still teaching me unselfishness. This past week I was at her house when she had just flown in from the UK. Because of the ash cloud and all that it had been quite the travel ordeal and she was exhausted. I could tell she just wanted to collapse into bed, but an old friend of hers was there and really needed someone to talk to. When I left, she was sitting on the sofa with her friend, listening intently even though her eyes looked like they desperately wanted to close. She could have just said, "Can we talk later? I'm so exhausted!" but she wasn't thinking about herself. That is just how she is all the time! I want to be like her in so many ways.

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  17. And I follow your blog -- thanks for all the inspiration!

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  18. I posted about your giveaway on my blog!

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  19. I just found your blog yesterday and i love it!

    i'm a follower for sure :)

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  20. I've learned that it's ok to put others before myself. My mom is so selfless and she is such a wonderful example to everyone around her. Moms are the best!

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  21. My Mom always taught me that even though we didn't always have the nicest things, we could still be a strong family and grow from one another. That still holds true today as I incorporate that same idea into my own family!

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  22. I follow your blog! My mother taught me to sew. Every time I cut out a garment, I remember her showing me how to line up the grain with the grainline because if I don't get it true, then the garment will never hang right. And, now that she's recovering from a fairly catastrophic stroke, she has taught me that you need courage to get through this life. And a lot of prayer. I hope my children can learn as much from me.

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  23. Thanks for sharing those special memories. Very touching. I have a special mother...who is my best friend. She taught me love. She always took me to church and to love the Lord. I hope that I can instill the same things in my children as she did for me.

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  24. Thanks for sharing your story with us. You certainly have a wonderful mother. My mother is no longer here, but I learned many things from her that I treasure always. She taught her three daughters to be self sufficient, yet love with all can and always trust. As my parents had a bitter divorce, the fact my mother stressed these values has always stayed. I'm happy to report I'm now celebrating my 23rd wedding anniversary with a delightful man.

    SewCalGal
    www.sewcalgal.blogspot.com

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  25. Ive been a follower for a little while now. I love this post!
    Sarah
    esgutierrez4@msn.com

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  26. My mom was very much the same as yours was growing up. No matter who was facing hard times she would get together care packages and deliver them to people. Only since Ive gotten older have I learned what a wonderful reputation she has in our community. Again, she never did these things and talked about it. It was just what she did behind the scenes and many have been blessed because of her.She surely is storing up treasures in heave-she still does these things to this day:)
    Sarah
    esgutierrez4@msn.com

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  27. My mother also taught me survival - she was a single parent with five little ones - little money but lots of love.

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  28. I learned that if Mom is happy, everyone is happy (so I need to be happy in my home as the mom)

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  29. Beautiful blog entry. Thanks for sharing! I learned to work hard from my mom. :)

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  30. My Mother taught me to love God with all my heart. =)

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  31. What a beautiful blog entry. My mom taught me patience and faith in enduring trials and that serving others will help you to forget your problems.

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  32. I learned from my mom that you have to believe that people and their intentions are good. It is dangerous to judge and assume things upon people. That people will do honorable things if put at a crossroad. Thanks so much!

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  33. What haven't I learned from my mom? She is such a wonderful woman and has become one of my dearest friends over the past several years. She taught me to be honest and love myself, to give and love deeply, and to live without regrets. She brought me to church three times a week, a gift which I appreciate so much today and will reciprocate when I have my own children. I aspire to be like my mother!

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  34. I lost my Mom last July to Cancer, this will be my first Mother's Day without her. My heart has been heavy for weeks thinking of this up coming Mother's Day. But my Mom was the strongest person I know, she always took care of everyone and anyone that came into her path.
    She had such Grace and Honor and taught me so much I couldn't even begin to write it down. She was an amazing women and Mother and I feel truly blessed to have been able to call her Mom.

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  35. ***&! I lost my very long post! sigh...here it is again but not as well said the first time :(

    "go where your husband goes; he comes first even over family" Simplistic, but I've seen marriages go bust because the wife wouldn't move where hubby's job was transferred to because she did not want to leave parents. I've stood by hubby's decisions for our family and have been blessed with a stronger marriage because of it.

    "if you can follow directions, you can do anything" This has helped me try MANY things like sewing, quilting, knitting, crocheting, cross stitch etc without being intimidated by trying something new. Thanks Mom! You have made life more meaningful!

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  36. Thank you for sharing about your moms. I am so grateful to have a wonderful mother-in-law as well. She is so supportive of all that my little family does. My mom, also is an amazing person. She is my best friend. I think that we relate so much better now that I'm an adult, but I love the support that we give to each other.

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  37. What a wonderful giveaway! My mom has become my best friend. She taught me how to be kind & friendly to anyone I met no matter their circumstances. She also had a knack for crafts when I was younger and I love that I enjoy that now that I am a mother. I'm so thankful for my mother & the friendship we continue to have! Thanks for the giveaway! :-)

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  38. I don't even know how to begin about all my mom is and has always been to me. She is the most giving person I know, she would do anything to help someone. She is an amazing example to me, especially as a new mommy myself. She is an amazing support and is always rooting for me no matter what!! She is Beautiful and I am always flattered when someone says that I look like her!! I love my mom :)

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  39. Lovely tribute to your two moms!Thanks for sharing and Happy Mother's Day to you!

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  40. Wow that is such a beautiful post, I am so moved by your words. You are lucky to have such great women in your life, and they are lucky to have you too!

    My mom has taught me so many things, I can't count them all but when I think of her I think of strength. She has gone through many tough times but always does her best to make things right, and adapt as she needs even when faced with difficulties. She is loyal and devoted to her family and loved ones and I love her so so much.

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  41. I am a follower, a linker and a lurker, please enter me in your mothers day contest. My mom has been gone for over 20 years now, but sometimes I still dream about her smiling face as she teaches me about making every day count. Her time on this earth was short and I believe I have tried to make my time here count too because of her.

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  42. My Mom taught me how to sew and be a good housekeeper.
    She loved us all 4 kids equally, but yet separate. She would always tell each one how much she loved them and still does.

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  43. My mother taught my sisters and I unconditional love. Whenever we were faced with a decision to do something that she knew would eventually hurt us, She would tell us,"You know how I feel about this, but I want you to know that no matter what decision you make, I will always love you." Knowing that we would always be loved and that she would let us make our own decisions, even if she didn't agree with them, helped us make the right ones. We would ultimately decide not to be rebellious, and it saved us from a lot of problems later on in our lives.

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  44. My mom always told me how proud she was of me, because of this I developed self esteem. I don't let anyone tell me I can't do soemthing!

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  45. I would love to win. I follow your blog!

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  46. Thank you for sharing about your mothers. They sound like wonderful examples. I am thankful that my mother has shown me to serve others. She is so unselfish about putting other people's needs before her own. Thank you! luscofamily@ortelco.net

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  47. My mother taught me how to be kind and understanding to people no matter who they are. She's always helping less fortunate people who don't have much; making them food or taking care of them if they're sick. She always tells me not to give up on people who have hurt me and to pray for them to have a change of heart. She's like my own personal Mother Teresa.

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  48. What a beautiful post, Sachiko. Thank you for sharing!

    Wow, I learned so much from my mom. What I learned is that no matter how hard life gets, if you have faith in God, He will take care of you. My parents are divorced and it was very hard on my mom to raise us 5 kids alone (one was married and moved away by then). Anyways, I admire my mom on so many levels. She is a very strong woman!

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  49. I follow your blog.

    By the way, I want to thank you for your super sweet comment on Disney's blog. You made me smile:). Thank you!!!

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  50. sharing and giving. my mom has next to nothing but she would give her last dollar to help someone out!!

    love her for that!

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  51. I have learned so many thing from my mother. Most importantly, how to be a wife and mother myself. She was, and still is an amazing teacher!
    ~Rebekah

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  52. Your writing is as lovely as your projects. My mother...what didn't she teach me? One of the best pieces of advice I got was right before I married. My mother said, "Don't be a martyr wife. Let your husband do things for you." I came from a traditional background and we still have a traditional relationship in many ways, but my husband can show his love by doing the dishes occasionally and I can feel his love by letting him. We had our 15th anniversary this week and a lot of that is due to good advice from Momma.

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  53. My mom taught me to be nice to people, and to love my family.

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  54. I love blog hopping...it takes me to the most amazing blogs like yours! I'm definitely a follower:)

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  55. So what i learned from my mama....well she was a crafty lady before arthritis got the better of her and when I was a young girl I remember her creating the dreamiest things with ribbon, lace, and yarn. I inherited her love of crafting and I will forever be grateful for that special gift. Thanks for the chance:)

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  56. I think the biggest life lesson my mom taught me was acceptance. Two of my brothers have learning disabilities and because she fought so fiercely for them to have the best life possible, I learned to love and accept anyone who might be different.

    Thanks you for sharing with us!

    violinjure at gmail dot com

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  57. I follow your blog

    violinjure at gmail dot com

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  58. That is very sweet tribute to both of your moms.

    MY my mom has taught me soo much. She is my rock. No matter what every happened she was on my side. Standing right now. Both my sisters moved away when I was pretty young, so she was like an older sister to me. As I have grown up and moved out we have gotten closer. She never gives up on me or anything she does. She has taught me that no matter your age or your ability you can do anything. You are never told old to start over and find out who you are. She is who I want to be

    Diana

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  59. My Mom is an amazing woman! She had a very successful business making custom designed wedding gowns and headpieces, and also as a wedding planner. She was making good money and had a couple years so busy she had a wedding just about every weekend. On my 19th Birthday, I found out I was pregnant. My Mom ended up closing up her business before I gave birth to my daughter Allyson, her first grandchild. She never made me feel bad about that. She always made me feel like being a grandma was her #1 priority. She even served as the "Room Nana" through 3rd grade when Allyson was in school. She has always been there for me and my daughter who is now 18.

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  60. What I've learned from my mom: Enjoy your kids now. When they're out of the house you won't be an old dried up prune--they'll be plenty of time to have alone time and pursue a career then.

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  61. I'm now a follower of your wonderful little blog!

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  62. When I was younger, I used to complain about how some people are just so rude and mean sounding towards me when I didn't provoke them in any way. My mother told me, no matter what happens, never react in the same manner as they do to me because they could be just having one of those bad days or have something in their life that they're not happy about so they're taking it out on others. So when situations like these happen, I always try to keep my cool and try to be understanding that there may be something that is bothering them.

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  63. your post was beautiful and made me cry. I can only imagine what your mother was feeling on the other side of that door. Sometimes it's so hard to do the things that will make our children stronger.

    My mom is my best friend and was such a great example of love, loyalty, compassion and courage. My mother in law is awesome and has welcomed me into the family with loving arms for which I am grateful because it makes my life with my husband and children so great!

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  64. I already follow with bloglines (not sure if that counts)

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  65. I probably take after my mom more than any of my siblings. She taught me to sew - which has been a passion all my life. And she taught me to love reading - which has been a passion all my life! I can't imagine what I'd be doing with myself now if it wasn't for the things I've learned from her!

    I love following your blog!

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  66. My Mom taught me what it means to love Jesus. It's the most important thing anyone has ever taught me, I do believe. She taught me many many other things as well, considering she raised me on her own.

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  67. I'm also following you now!

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  68. Oh my, what beautiful stories.
    I learned to never be afraid to try from my mum. Even if it doesn't work out or you fall on your face at least you tried and I have never been afraid to try even if it meant people laughing at me. I hope I can pass that onto my kids.

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  69. I am definately a follower now!!!

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  70. My MIL has to be one of the best. She has always done her best to put me and her grandchildren first. She has a true servants heart. I can ALWAYS count on her for help.

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  71. What a touching post. My daughter also has medical issues. I hope I can raise her to be as courageous and creative as you. My mom taught me to work hard and believe in myself. She is my hero and I owe what I am today to her.

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  72. Thank you very much for your touching blog! No matter how hard our lives become, when we stop and look we can still find countless blessings around us. I became a follower because of your terrific tutorials. My mother has taught me how to give -- not money or possessions, but time. Although she's been a retired teacher for almost 10 years, she is busier than ever. Besides being a Sunday School teacher and active church member, she teaches English to non-English speaking children, cares for my ailing grandparents, and visits several home-bound seniors. No matter how tired or busy she is, she always finds at least a moment for those who need it. She inspires me to be a better version of myself.

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  73. My mom taught me unconditional love. Despite peoples flaws you should still love and support them!

    thepricklypinecone(at)hotmail(dot)com

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  74. I am following your blog.

    thepricklypinecone(at)hotmail(dot)com

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  75. My mom taught me to adapt to any situation - we moved around a lot as children and she was our rock, making sure we adjusted and above all making sure that me and my siblings were all friends with each other. She is such a blessing in my life.

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  76. Beautiful post. My mom loves people unconditionally. I feel like that is the best gift I can give my kids is that they know I love them no matter what choices they will make in life. I am grateful to my mom for always doing that.

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  77. I am a follower, love your blog.

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  78. I learned from my mom how to be a good hostess. To plan, make lists, be orderly - not just throw it together. It makes for a more peaceful time.

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  79. I'm a follower and you won't see my face in a little square... no no no.

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  80. About my mom... so much things I learn from her... She is not with me anymore and I miss her each day of my life. Now, I'm a grandmother, and I try to help my grand daugther like my mom help mine and myself.
    thank you

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  81. My mother..........it is ill in a bed and its words and its suggestions miss a lot me, I would want the time to return back and to be once still with her as.......
    I always follow your blog and I make you the compliments and excuse for my English hi M.Grazia
    www.pettirossoinfreddolito.blogspot.com

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  82. I forgot to post separately that I am a follower! I linked to you in my post today, my mom's story flowed out of me on to the blog. Brings back to me how important mothers are! thanks for doing this1

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  83. Most of all my mom taught me to believe in myself and my talents.

    I follow now too.

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  84. I've learned many things from my mother, but the most important thing was to love God and follow Him. When you put him first in your life, everything else falls into place. She also taught me many good character traits like patience, kindness, strength, courage, etc...
    I'm your newest follower! :)

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  85. I was just reading your story. It's an amazing story!
    Awsome to read about your mom and mom!
    Crazy, but I also call my mom in law mom! She's so much a mother to me! She's so awesome!!!

    Love Miranda

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  86. I like this warm-hearted post :) Thanks for sharing this. You are lucky to have wonderful mother and mother in -law. And they are lucky to have you too :)

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